TV Guide TV Land Monday

No thanks to Elaine, Jerry is forced to work hard to prove he is straight when a college reporter mistakenly reports that he and George are gay.

Jerry, Elaine and George volunteer to help the elderly; Kramer and Newman attempt to make money by selling old records to a used record store.

Jerry dumps his girlfriend after Elaine says her figure is the result of breast implants; Elaine accidently discovers that the breasts are real.

While watching an operation, Kramer and Jerry have an accident with a Junior Mint; Jerry has a date with a woman whose name rhymes with a female body part.

Jerry and Elaine try to discover the origin of a mysterious and pungent odor left in Jerry's car; George wants Susan back after he learns she is a lesbian.

An angry mob trashes Frank's car when George parks it in a handicap spot; the gang splits the cost of a big screen TV for the Drake's wedding.

Jerry and George get the green light to produce "Jerry," the pilot for the series based on their nothing lives; George thinks an actor stole his box of raisins.

The pilot is short lived when Russell mysteriously disappears and the new NBC president thinks Jerry cannot act; George asks TV Kramer about the raisins.

Jerry begs Elaine for another chance when he finds out she faked her orgasms; George tells Jerry about his lack of confidence below his belt.

George's glasses are stolen so he goes to see Kramer's friend to get a thirty percent discount on a new pair; Elaine becomes afraid of dogs.

When Christine discovers that her new boyfriend is actually the father of New Christine, she begins to seriously rethink their relationship.

When Ritchie begins asking endless questions about his newfound interest in religion after Richard and New Christine take him to a church festival.

Drew chats with the legendary Laura Dern!

Style expert Kristina Zias gives the rundown on winter fashion must-haves. Dr. Whitney Bowe gives her advice on the best winter skincare.

Andy feels neglected after Helen decides to use her talent to author a book of children's tales, devote her free time to writing at the cost of her relationship

Opie is given responsibility of looking after a horse while the owner is away on business, but he faces a dilemma when the horse refuses to eat.

Opie is tackled with a difficult decision, when he must choose to either become a member of the football team or continue to take piano lessons.

Howard cracks jokes on TV, but the jokes sound too familiar to the Mayberry townsfolk and they do not care to be made fun of.

Hawkeye is becoming infuriated with the war after being up for three straight days with no sleep, and he intends on figuring out who started the war.

Hawkeye operates on a kid who arrived at the camp, and Radar has no way to find his family to inform them, leaving a decision to be made on what to do with him.

Corporal Walker is given his release papers to head home, but he decides he wants to marry his Korean girlfriend so she and their kid can return with him.

Matt is carrying a signed confession paper that will hang a man, but bounty hunters chase after him in order to claim the reward offered by the condemned man.

After Kitty takes is left in charge of an escapee from a military prison, she becomes convinced that her guest is innocent of the charges he's been convicted of

Matt's old friend, who was once a respected and dedicated lawman, arrives in Dodge City in order to get revenge against the men who murderer his beloved wife.

Outlaw Yancy Tyce and his outlaw gang try to free Tyce's younger brother, who is now under arrest and being taken to Dodge by Matt.

A former marshal arrives in Dodge to get revenge against Matt after just being released from prison for killing an outlaw in cold blood

Henry Bennett's presence coincides with disaster, leading Barney to convince the town he's a jinx, but Andy tries to turn the town around.

Barney blunders and a criminal escapes, and Andy and Barney must now recapture the robber and his partner to save their reputation with the state police.

Opie hopes to win a medal in the annual Sheriff's Boys' Day race and gets lessons on racing from Barney, but receives lessons on sportsmanship from Andy.

When the choir discovers Barney's voice is the source of the choir's terrible sound, they realize he can't stay, but haven't got the heart to tell him.

On Founder's Day, the town decides to honor the first visitor with the key to the city, unfortunately, that person is an expert pickpocket and petty thief.

When a traveling salesman comes to town, Ben Weaver demands the law be followed that prohibits anyone from selling goods without a permanent structure.

Debra and Marie pressure Ray and Frank into participating in one of Robert's therapy sessions, but the guys find trips to the track more helpful.

Thanksgiving has rolled around again, and both Debra and Ray are bracing for the worst as all of the family members and in-laws gather for a first gathering.

Amy and Robert learn living with Frank and Marie isn't going to be as easy as they had first expected it to be, when a solicitous Marie offers romantic gifts.

Concerned that Peter is alone, Amy's parents ask Ray to offer their son some advice on dating, and he and Debra even plan a party so he can socialize.

When Debra becomes fed up with Ray leaving his stuff lying around, she takes lessons from Marie in how to deal with his messiness.

Ray manages to draw the ire of his family after making an offhand comment to amuse a kid that ends up having quite the opposite effect.

Marie is afraid she has lost her touch in the kitchen when she catches Frank adding salt to her homemade lasagna, but Ray and Robert uncover the real truth.

Robert fights a losing battle to keep his composure after Ray tells him Amy is too much of a chatterbox, and a huge family squabble ensues.

While buying some ice cream from the ice cream man, Doug notices a "for sale" sign and buys the truck, and in turn, gets harassed by another ice cream man.

An obsessed woman who swears that she spent a romantic weekend with Doug keeps calling the house, and Doug tries everything to get her to stop.

When O'Boyle checks into rehab, Doug and Deacon are asked to fill in; however, Doug thinks that he may not be right for the job once the office loses control.

Deacon changes the ending of a story, leaving him too scared to spend the weekend with the Heffermans; Arthur figures out a way to make money in carpooling.

Doug makes an appearance at a neighborhood party to which he and Carrie were not invited, and to prove that they are good people, he adopts a dog.

Doug has Deacon's son draw a stick figure of Carrie in hopes that it will make her want to purchase an enhancement that the two of them could benefit from.

George's new gig as a hand model has him obsessed about hand safety; Jerry unknowingly agrees to wear a puffy shirt designed by Kramer's girlfriend on TV.

Jerry, Kramer and Newman hatch a scheme to find out if Jerry's accountant uses drugs; George's father gets him an interview as a bra salesman.

Elaine and Jerry are nervous about the religious duties they must do when they agree to become godparents to a couple's newborn; George nabs great parking spot.

Jerry becomes smitten over a line judge at the U.S. open, but after finally getting her attention, he discovers that she is deaf; Kramer becomes a ball boy.

The girls take Roseanne to the Beauty Box for Mother's Day, but the kids' ulterior motive to attend a rock concert is foiled when they are told they can't go.

Roseanne and Dan start searching for any good news after the diner and the bike shop are both shut down, leaving them out of work and no means of money.

Becky seriously considers moving to Minneapolis with Mark when Dan's motorcycle shop closes down and leaves the family in debt.

Roseanne and Dan prepare to say goodbye to Becky after she and Mark make one last stop by the house before starting their new life together.