TV Guide TV Land Saturday

Carrie wins four company seats to the Knicks games for a month but is undecided on who to take; Arthur tries to fix parking tickets for Deacon.

Deacon has the kids for Thanksgiving but wants a traditional Thanksgiving meal, so Doug offers Carrie as a surrogate wife but Holly outshines her.

It is Christmas time and Carrie decides she is going to outspend everyone; Deacon and Doug fight over Mentalo, a doll from their youth.

Carrie sends Doug to a therapist regarding his overeating, and he shows promise so Carrie asks the therapist to "help" with other issues behind Doug's back.

Jerry meets Keith Hernandez and wants to make a good impression, but after being introduced to Elaine, Keith breaks his date with Jerry to make one with her.

Elaine and Keith are hitting it off until he pulls out a cigarette; Keith wants Jerry to help him move, leading Jerry along with Elaine to breakup with Keith.

Jerry and George take a limo from a passenger that Jerry knows never made it on the plane, but their false identities land them in hot water.

Jerry tracks down a hit-and-run driver to confront her, but he ends up asking her on a date; Kramer has violent reactions to Mary Hart's voice.

Christine allows the friends who got Richard with New Christine to set her up on a series of blind dates, leading to an unlikely relationship.

Richard begins to grow jealous when he hears about Christine's budding new relationship, and he decides to try to sabotage her date.

After going on ten dates with Burton, Christine wonders if the time has come to take the next step and invite him over to meet her son.

Concerned with the lack of diversity at Ritchie's school, Christine decides to remedy the situation, but her efforts have some unforeseen consequences.

Roseanne is called in to Darlene's school & learns that she randomly barks when she is at school. Roseanne tries to figure out why. Dan Agrue Responsibility.

Dan brings home some extra cash from his work which causes the rest of the family to begin considering the ways that they would spend the cash.

Roseanne plans a getaway at the Landford Inn to spend some alone time with Dan, and despite his reluctance at first, he decides to go along with her.

Dan has grown tired of Jackie's constant bickering about everything he wants her to do and is brought past the tipping point when she comments on his chili.

Dan learns of a country song writing contest on a local radio station and realizes that the poem Roseanne recently wrote may be the perfect fit to win.

The Conners head to the bowling alley for their Friday night festivities when Becky notices a boy there that she likes but must avoid getting embarrassed.

Dan hires a photographer to come take a family portrait for his high school reunion, but tempers flare when Jackie says Dan cheated on Roseanne long ago.

Crystal passes the time by thinking of herself negatively, leaving Roseanne and Jackie to show her that she should stop letting people walk over her.

Though Roseanne had planned the perfect birthday party for Dan at the bar, a bully ruins it by picking a fight, forcing Dan to walk away and keep a promise.

Sick and tired of seeing Dan work on his truck every Saturday, Roseanne decides to make a bet with him to see if he'll get the truck running again.

A garage sale is coming up and Dan becomes upset when he is told by Roseanne that he has to put up some of the junk that has meaning to him.

Dan and Roseanne get in a heated argument on where to go for their upcoming 15th anniversary, while Darlene finds her new job to be tougher than she thought.

Crystal becomes distraught after thinking about her husband's death; Darlene dabbles with smoking; Roseanne has a secret about Sonny and wants to tell Crystal.

Dan's father visits the house with gifts for the family, making everyone happy except for Dan, who becomes the target of every one of his father's insults.

Roseanne is losing sleep due to Darlene's re-occurring nightmares that she thinks are happening because they watched a horror film that scared her.

Roseanne and the girls are at the Landford Mall to prepare for the annual mall-wide sales; Roseanne realizes that Dan needs new shoes and Becky a dress.

Becky finds herself falling for two guys and having trouble choosing, Roseanne and Dan try to help by inviting one of the boy's parents over for dinner.

Roseanne is filled with guilt when she learns Darlene has to get an emergency surgery after arguing with her earlier in the morning about her baseball game.

Roseanne and her coworkers are assigned to work longer shifts at the plastics company that becomes extra tiring for her due to the household she goes home to.

Kramer poses for a painting that an elderly couple becomes obsessed about; George feels obligated to buy expensive art from Jerry's new girlfriend.

George gets into a confrontation about a parking space in front of Jerry's apartment; Kramer tells Jerry about his friend Mike and calls him a phony.

Kramer begins to invade Jerry's personal life, so Jerry revokes his spare key privileges; Kramer takes off for California to pursue his acting dream.

Jerry and George head to Los Angeles for Jerry's appearance on "The Tonight Show" and look for Kramer, who is suspected of being a local serial killer.

Jerry and George try to contact the police to tell them Kramer is innocent; Kramer decides to stay in Los Angeles but then returns to New York City.

NBC executives ask Jerry to come up with an idea for a TV series, and George comes up with an idea for a show about nothing; Newman gets a speeding ticket.

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Kramer agrees to be an alibi for Newman's trial on a speeding ticket; Jerry throws out a watch his parents gave him, which his Uncle Leo finds.

George negotiates a deal with the NBC executives and gets a box of cigars from Susan's father; Morty's wallet is stolen while he is at the doctor's office.

Carrie feels Doug is not giving her attention so she finds a replacement in Lou Ferrigno; Doug competes to throw the "best" Super Bowl party.

Doug and Carrie feel their lives are lacking when they accidentally pick up another couples photos, so they emulate what they view in the photos.

Doug and Deacon are stuck delivering Penguins on Valentine's Day so Carrie decides to take Holly out, meanwhile Spence dates a woman his grandmother's age.

Doug and Carrie spend a huge chunk of money on their dream vacation with their new neighbors, but Doug neglects to tell Carrie that their house has a problem.

Christine insists that she wants to spend some time alone after breaking up with Burton, but a humiliating experience dining out makes her rethink her feelings.

Christine wants to throw a party for Ritchie's ninth birthday that will impress the other parents, but finds the cost of a party planner discouraging.

Old Christine isn't quite sure how to take the situation when Richard continues to bring New Christine along with him to all of Ritchie's school functions.

When her former marriage counselor comes into her gym, Christine starts to wonder what her motives were for encouraging her to divorce Richard.

When Richard takes Ritchie to a Rolling Stones concert against Christine's wishes, she sneaks inside the venue in order to keep tabs on her son.

Christine is relieved to finally meet another working mom at her son's elite school, but is surprised by the line of work she is actually in.

When Christine runs into her ex-boyfriend Burton at a school fair, she finds that her hopes of a reunion have been dashed by his new girlfriend.

When Ritchie comes to the mistaken belief that his parents have gotten back together, Richard and Christine consider giving it another try.

Determined to start saying yes to life, Christine agrees to a date with a handsome stranger she meets near New Christine's apartment.

When Christine discovers that her new boyfriend is actually the father of New Christine, she begins to seriously rethink their relationship.