TV Guide Comedy Central Thursday

Chris unexpectedly becomes homecoming king; but when Meg learns that the cool kids are planning to prank him during the homecoming ceremony, they investigate.

When Brian falls in love with a tech support worker in India, he and Stewie go to India to find her; Peter becomes the center of attention at Joe's bingo night.

The rest of the town takes a cue from Mr. Garrison and decides to get in touch with their feminine side; Kyle hopelessly fails trying to play basketball.

Stan's father decides to visit a bleeding statue of the Virgin Mary, where he waits and hopes for a miraculous cure for his alcohol problem.

As a contestant on the show "Wheel of Fortune," Randy uses the "n" word, causing problems for the entire community; Cartman battles a little person.

Cartman turns foul language into an art form after he realizes he can freely state his crass opinions by pretending to suffer from Tourette syndrome.

Kenny tries to take his relationship to the next level by his girlfriend to a Jonas Brothers concert, where his dreams of having sex are squashed.

In the town of South Park, a lone vigilante named "The Coon" rises up and fights against crime; an unknown child attempts to clean up the streets.

When Randy creates a new plan that will fix everyone's financial problems, the town follows his advice and starts living an economic-free life.

An April Fools joke starts a trend that is picked up by the women of South Park, and Kyle, Stan and the rest of the boys try to put a stop to it.

When Cartman helps Jimmy come up with a new joke for his comedy routine, it becomes an instant hit and takes off on the late night talk shows.

While helping Stan build a car for the Boy Scout's Pinewood Derby race, Randy begins to obsess over the car's design and works deep into the night.

Cartman convinces Butters and a small gang of boys to run away from their homes in South Park and live with him as pirates on the infamous Skull Island.

When Ike is haunted by dead celebrities, Kyle and the boys hire professional ghost hunters to investigate the Broflovski house for paranormal activity.

The boys make fun of Butters when they discover he has made it to fourth grade without kissing a girl, so he becomes determined to get his first.

After attending their very first WWE match, the boys feel called to become professional wrestlers, so they decide to join the school wrestling club.

Stan and his family spend his birthday at the Denver Aquarium where they plan to swim with the dolphins, but the Japanese show up and ruin everything.

When wealthy, successful men start having intercourse with many women, the boys from South Park discover they have the same sexual addiction.

Four elementary school students and their friends have wild misadventures, often acting as a voice of reason amid the crazy events that plague their town.

After given permission to read a controversial book at school, Stan, Cartman, Kyle and Kenny are inspired to write a contentious novel of their own.

Cartman's favorite fried chicken restaurant is closed down and replaced by a store that sells medicinal marijuana to people with a physician's reference.

Kyle accidentally becomes friends with the wrong person on Facebook, so Cartman and the boys completely desert him and leave him with no friends.

Jimmy and Timmy head off to summer camp with all their handicapable friends, where they work hard to become champions of an annual competition.

Despite his doubts about making it to the top, Cartman becomes determined to do whatever it takes to race in the NASCAR circuit, with Butters as his pit boss.

New Jersey begins to take over the country one state at a time, but when the Jerseyites seek to conquer South Park, Randy and the boys take a stand.

Stan and Mr. Mackey deal with their hoarding addictions, which allows Stan to see what it was like for Mr. Mackey in the fourth grade at South Park Elementary.

Stan gets left behind when Randy becomes overly obsessed with the Food Network, which leads Sharon to run away with a new interest of her own.

Kyle finds himself trapped as an unwilling participant in a grotesque new technological innovation developed by Apple founder Steve Jobs.

South Park Elementary's Special Education department decides to begin an annual comedy award ceremony, and Jimmy is given the opportunity to serve as host.

When the Prince of Canada decides to take a bride, baby Ike becomes obsessed with his native country's Royal Wedding along with the rest of Canada.

Cartman becomes outraged when the school reveals the penis sizes of all the children at South Park Elementary on a bulletin board.

Cartman starts a new business in South Park called "The Crack Baby Athletic Association," and he invites Kyle to get in the company on the ground floor.

Butters discovers that he has been diagnosed with multiple personality disorder; a psychologist attempts to help Butters figure out what is happening to him.

Stan finds himself acting differently after celebrating his 10th birthday, but his new attitude begins to upset the rest of the boys.

After discovering that he is afflicted with Asperger's Syndrome, Cartman develops a unique way of coping with his ailment that even Kyle and Kenny accept.

After deciding to join the U.S. Border Patrol, Cartman soon begins to realize that he possesses a skill for stopping illegal aliens from entering into America.

The students of South Park Elementary learn that someone has hacked into their phones and emails and is now posting their private information online.

Randy becomes enamored with musical theatre and decides to take Sharon on a trip to New York in order to catch every show that Broadway has to offer.

The kids at South Park Elementary all gang up on Cartman after they are punished due to the fact that he has thrown off the school's physical fitness curve.

After viewing a television special on The History Channel, the boys begin to believe that extraterrestrials were involved in the original Thanksgiving feast.

When Kenny's parents are arrested and sent to jail, he and his siblings find themselves being forced to enter the foster care system.

When a catastrophe results from one of the boys forgetting to put the toilet seat down after relieving himself, a government agency is called in to fix things.

Cartman starts his own gem shopping channel and soon finds himself controlling a lucrative business that preys upon an extremely vulnerable clientele.

The human race finds itself in an unexpected situation when all of mankind begins evolving at an increasingly rapid and disturbing pace.

Stan decides to raise awareness about the national epidemic of bullying by shooting a big dance video; Butters becomes the victim of an unlikely bully.

Brian and Lois decide to help Chris with his anger by playing sports; Chris surprises his family by becoming a star baseball pitcher, leading Peter to gamble.

Quagmire is forced to work as a gigolo when the local airline pilots go on strike and enlists Peter's help when some of his clients refuse to pay.

Viewers get a behind-the-scenes look at a production week at "Family Guy," as James Woods tours the workings of the show and what it takes to make an episode.

Chris makes a viral video to ask Taylor Swift to go to his homecoming dance with him, but when she begins to fall for him, her music takes a turn.

The boys run into trouble in the Colorado Mountains and find themselves attempting to survive all alone in the wild while waiting for someone to rescue them.

When Cartman begins to experience romantic feelings for a new girl at school, he decides to make a gesture in order to keep anyone from getting between them.

Stan, Kyle, Kenny and Cartman become involved in a crisis at South Park Elementary when excessive football concussions become a serious problem.

Cartman finally admits that he is fat, but only so that he can claim riding around on a scooter as his right; later, he learns of his new rival, Honey Boo Boo.

The entire town becomes suspicious when Kyle believes that his mother is having an affair with the UPS man; Cartman signs up for a home security system.

After Butters starts causing trouble at school and his parents tell him a secret about his heritage, he travels to Hawaii to learn the customs of his people.

Randy has big plans for the night of Halloween, and unfortunately, those plans make it so that Stan can't go trick or treating with his friends.

Everyone's faith in an icon is shattered, and the people who once donned yellow bracelets in support of the old hero are cutting them off, except for Stan.

Little does the nation know that the results of the Presidential election could hinge on something that Eric Cartman is hiding in his bedroom.

Fourth-grader Eric Cartman is able to infiltrate the National Security Agency, but he is upset at the information that he finds in his personal file.