Cozi TV TV Guide — Today's TV Listings & Schedule

Browse the full Cozi TV TV guide for today. 44 programmes listed , including 12 tonight. US listings updated daily — scroll down to tonight's highlights or use the day tabs above to browse the weekly schedule.

Early Morning

00:00 30m

George Lopez

S4 · E11 · Prescription for Trouble Comedy

Prescription for Trouble

George and Angie begin to worry that Carmen is about to start being sexually active, so they decide to bribe her with a car if she will wait.

00:30 30m

George Lopez

S4 · E12 · Friends Don't Let Friends Marry Drunks Comedy

Friends Don't Let Friends Marry Drunks

George discovers that Ernie's new girlfriend has been unfaithful, and he struggles with the decision of whether he should tell his best friend.

01:00 30m

George Lopez

S4 · E13 · George to the Third Power Comedy

George to the Third Power

George becomes frustrated after he discovers that Max's dentist has been making inconsiderate remarks, so he lobbies to have the company dental plan changed.

01:30 30m

George Lopez

S4 · E14 · George Gets Assisterance Comedy

George Gets Assisterance

George attends a PTA meeting being run by his estranged sister and accidentally informs her that she was given up for adoption and that Benny is her mother.

02:00 30m

Roseanne

S9 · E2 · Millions from Heaven Comedy

Millions from Heaven

After learning from Jackie that they have won a huge lottery prize, the Conners swear that they won't change as they make plans to spend the money.

02:30 30m

Roseanne

S9 · E3 · What a Day for a Daydream Comedy

What a Day for a Daydream

Roseanne begins to get lightheaded after receiving her lottery winnings and begins to daydream about being on the Jerry Springer Show and meeting Hugh Hefner.

03:00 30m

The Nanny

S5 · E15 · The Engagement Comedy

The Engagement

Maxwell tells Niles that he has picked out an engagement ring and is preparing to ask for Fran's hand in marriage, but Niles lets the secret out.

03:30 30m

The Nanny

S5 · E16 · The Dinner Party Comedy

The Dinner Party

While picking out an engagement ring and hosting a dinner party, Fran begins to feel that she is held in low regard by upper-class citizens.

04:00 30m

The Nanny

S5 · E17 · Homie-Work Comedy

Homie-Work

Fran tells Maxwell that she has found the lead for his newest rap musical, but she instead finds a gift-wrapper; C.C. is driven crazy by Niles.

04:30 30m

The Nanny

S5 · E18 · The Reunion Show Comedy

The Reunion Show

Fran is excited to attend her high-school reunion as a newly engaged woman; Niles feels depressed since C.C. has been away for an extended period of time.

05:00 30m

Bob Hearts Abishola

Comedy

A middle-aged businessman develops a romantic interest in his cardiac nurse while he recovers from a heart attack and becomes determined to earn her affections.

05:30 30m

Bob Hearts Abishola

Comedy

A middle-aged businessman develops a romantic interest in his cardiac nurse while he recovers from a heart attack and becomes determined to earn her affections.

Morning

07:00 1h

Highway to Heaven

S4 · E17 · We Have Forever: Part 1 Drama

We Have Forever: Part 1

Jonathan gets a "feeling" while he and Mark are on their way towards their next job, so he goes to the hospital where he sees his wife is near death.

08:00 1h

Highway to Heaven

S4 · E18 · We Have Forever: Part 2 Drama

We Have Forever: Part 2

Jonathan is still irritated with God for not letting him go heaven to see Jane one last time and he becomes human after being dead for 40 years.

09:00 30m

Malcolm & Eddie

S1 · E11 · It's the Bomb Comedy

It's the Bomb

A demented bomb-toting football fan takes everyone hostage at the bar in protest of the supposed move of his favorite team to another city.

09:30 30m

Malcolm & Eddie

S1 · E12 · Sh-Boing-Boing Comedy

Sh-Boing-Boing

When Malcolm's grandfather gets kicked out of the house by his grandmother, he tries his best to get the feuding couple to reconcile.

10:00 30m

The Steve Harvey Show

S5 · E17 · After the Fall Comedy

After the Fall

A television producer interviews Steve's friends for a documentary about a former singer who's short time in the spotlight has come to its end.

10:30 30m

The Steve Harvey Show

S6 · E1 · Secret Lovers Comedy

Secret Lovers

Regina institutes an unbreakable ban on public displays of affection at school but quickly runs into complications when Bullethead sees her kissing Steve.

11:00 30m

Hangin' with Mr. Cooper

S2 · E12 · Private School Comedy

Private School

When Mark is assigned to teach American history at a private school, he finds out that the students are white, so decides to teach them about black history.

11:30 30m

Hangin' with Mr. Cooper

S2 · E13 · For Whom the Heck the Bell Tolls Comedy

For Whom the Heck the Bell Tolls

Nicole dresses and acts like Vanessa to test whether men will treat her differently; Mark is asked to speak at the funeral of a man he doesn't remember.

Daytime

12:00 30m

The Nanny

S1 · E11 · A Plot for Nanny Comedy

A Plot for Nanny

Fran becomes shocked when she discovers that the mortuary manager she has begun seeing has decided to enroll in a school for clowns.

12:30 30m

The Nanny

S1 · E12 · The Show Must Go On Comedy

The Show Must Go On

Fran becomes the director for Grace's school play, but Maxwell soon determines that he would be a better fit for the job and decides to take the reins.

13:00 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E17 · First Cousin, Twice Removed Comedy

First Cousin, Twice Removed

Roseanne hasn't seen her cousin in 25 years, but when she visits Lanford to make amends with her, Roseanne has to think whether she should forgive her cousin.

13:30 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E18 · Lose a Job, Winnebago Comedy

Lose a Job, Winnebago

Roseanne joins the Tildens when they announce that they are taking a road trip vacation in their Winnebago; Roseanne encourages the Tildens to go to California.

14:00 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E19 · It's a Boy! Comedy

It's a Boy!

Dan and Roseanne initially refuse to let Darlene's boyfriend move into their home, but they change their minds after meeting his abusive mother.

14:30 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E20 · It Was Twenty Years Ago Today Comedy

It Was Twenty Years Ago Today

Roseanne and Dan celebrate their 20th wedding anniversary, but they struggle with what to give one another; Dan finds out Roseanne bought him an expensive gift.

15:00 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E15 · God Needles George Comedy

God Needles George

The Lopez family contemplates putting Needles to sleep when they learn that he has a tumor; George and Max make extravagant promises while praying for the dog.

15:30 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E16 · Benny and Randy Comedy

Benny and Randy

Randy wants to take his relationship with Benny to the next level, but she balks at the idea; George inadvertently prompts Randy to break up with her.

16:00 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E17 · Weekend at Benny's Comedy

Weekend at Benny's

George is left in charge of the kids when Angie is away on business; when Carmen and Max misbehave, George sends them to Benny's house for the weekend.

16:30 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E18 · Jason Tutors Max Comedy

Jason Tutors Max

Max must pass an upcoming state-mandated test, leaving George and Angie to search for a suitable tutor; Jason volunteers to be Max's tutor.

17:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E13 · The Godfather Comedy

The Godfather

When Kelly begins dating a 41-year-old gentleman with the right connections, Al suddenly becomes known as the neighborhood godfather.

17:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E14 · Look Who's Barking Comedy ▶ Now

Look Who's Barking

Buck brings a female dog into the Bundy's house, but he feels neglected when the family only cares about the new dog and ignores him.

Tonight's Highlights

18:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E15 · A Man's Castle Comedy

A Man's Castle

Upon completing classes at a school for decorating, Peg makes Al's bathroom sanctuary her first project and proceeds to drench the entire room in pink paint.

18:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E16 · All Night Security Dude Comedy

All Night Security Dude

Al obtains a job as a security guard at Polk High, but he gets fired from his new job after the championship trophy is stolen by his old nemesis.

19:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E17 · Oldies but Young 'Uns Comedy

Oldies but Young 'Uns

Al drives himself completely insane while trying to remember the name of a specific song after hearing it get some air time on a radio station.

19:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S5 · E18 · Weenie Tot Lovers & Other Strangers Comedy

Weenie Tot Lovers & Other Strangers

Al has to choose whether to spend his money on Bud's visit to the White House or to pay for Kelly to enter a Miss Weenie Tot contest.

20:00 30m

The King of Queens

S2 · E4 · Parent Trapped Comedy

Parent Trapped

Deacon and Kelly ask Doug and Carrie to be their baby's godparents but Carrie is reluctant of the responsibility until they see a new couple take their place.

20:30 30m

The King of Queens

S2 · E8 · Dire Strayts Comedy

Dire Strayts

When Ray Barone and Debra come over for a BBQ, Carrie and Debra bond over their insensitive husbands while Doug and Ray just want to watch the game on TV.

21:00 30m

The King of Queens

S2 · E6 · Doug Out Comedy

Doug Out

Doug and Carrie take Arthur to a Mets game to make up for calling him a demented circus monkey but wind up in the stadium jail.

21:30 30m

The King of Queens

S2 · E5 · Tube Stakes Comedy

Tube Stakes

Carrie feels so bad for leaving the garage door open, which led to Doug's big screen TV being stolen, that she goes out to buy him another one.

22:00 30m

Two and a Half Men

S1 · E9 · Phase One, Complete Comedy

Phase One, Complete

Charlie's newest fling befriends both Jake and Evelyn, as she positions herself to force him into an unwanted long term relationship he can't get out of.

22:30 30m

Two and a Half Men

S1 · E10 · Merry Thanksgiving Comedy

Merry Thanksgiving

Attempting to win over newly engaged Lisa, Charlie bribes his family to come together for a customary Thanksgiving dinner to portray himself as a "family man."

23:00 30m

Two and a Half Men

S1 · E11 · Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor Comedy

Alan Harper, Frontier Chiropractor

The guys run into new-look Judith and her boyfriend at the movies, causing Alan to consider changing his appearance for the sake of reentering the dating scene.

23:30 30m

Two and a Half Men

S1 · E12 · Camel Filters and Pheromones Comedy

Camel Filters and Pheromones

The guys run into trouble when Berta's granddaughter accompanies her to work, and the men realize she is an alluringly flirtatious, insubordinate minor.