Cozi TV TV Guide — Today's TV Listings & Schedule

Browse the full Cozi TV TV guide for today. 44 programmes listed , including 12 tonight. US listings updated daily — scroll down to tonight's highlights or use the day tabs above to browse the weekly schedule.

Early Morning

00:00 30m

George Lopez

S5 · E12 · George Enrolls Like That Comedy

George Enrolls Like That

George has a difficult time when he enrolls in college attempting to set a positive example for Max after he catches him skipping school.

00:30 30m

George Lopez

S5 · E13 · George Keeps Truant to Himself Comedy

George Keeps Truant to Himself

George attempts to hide his truancy after he drops out of school, but his professor comes by the house, alerting Angie and the kids.

01:00 30m

George Lopez

S5 · E14 · The Kidney Stays in the Picture Comedy

The Kidney Stays in the Picture

When Max begins wetting the bed while he sleeps, George decides to take him to the doctor in order to determine the cause; George learns that Max needs surgery.

01:30 30m

George Lopez

S5 · E16 · George Gets Caught in a Powers Play Comedy

George Gets Caught in a Powers Play

George attempts to teach his niece the value of working hard by putting her to work at the factory, but she uses her feminine charm to get everything she wants.

02:00 30m

Roseanne

S1 · E21 · Death and Stuff Comedy

Death and Stuff

The Conners are busy prepping the house for potential buyers for their washer and dryer when a door-to-door salesman they greet drops dead in the kitchen.

02:30 30m

Roseanne

S1 · E22 · Dear Mom and Dad Comedy

Dear Mom and Dad

Roseanne's parents make a visit to the house and instantly get the family in an uproar, while Dan and Jackie try to persuade Roseanne to stand up for herself.

03:00 30m

The Nanny

S3 · E11 · The Unkindest Gift Comedy

The Unkindest Gift

Fran and the Sheffield's travel to Hollywood in order to appear on a television show that is featuring a humorous home video that Fran sent in.

03:30 30m

The Nanny

S3 · E12 · The Kibbutz Comedy

The Kibbutz

Maxwell attempts to keep Maggie away from boys for the Christmas holiday by sending her away to a Jewish collective community on Fran's advice.

04:00 30m

The Nanny

S3 · E13 · An Offer She Can't Refuse Comedy

An Offer She Can't Refuse

Fran discovers that the man she is dating is possibly connected to a crime family, but she becomes too scared to end the relationship.

04:30 30m

The Nanny

S3 · E15 · Fashion Show Comedy

Fashion Show

Fran becomes featured negatively in a fashion magazine after Maxwell leaves the house in a rush and brings her a handbag that doesn't match her outfit.

05:00 30m

Bob Hearts Abishola

Comedy

A middle-aged businessman develops a romantic interest in his cardiac nurse while he recovers from a heart attack and becomes determined to earn her affections.

05:30 30m

Bob Hearts Abishola

Comedy

A middle-aged businessman develops a romantic interest in his cardiac nurse while he recovers from a heart attack and becomes determined to earn her affections.

Morning

07:00 1h

Highway to Heaven

S2 · E5 · The Devil and Jonathan Smith Drama

The Devil and Jonathan Smith

Mark accidentally runs over a young girl which leads to him relinquishing his soul without question in hopes of saving the life of the girl he killed.

08:00 1h

Highway to Heaven

S2 · E6 · Birds of a Feather Drama

Birds of a Feather

Jonathan discovers contaminated water, and after he sees a sick bird die, he sets out to convince the people of the town of the organization's misdeeds.

09:00 30m

Malcolm & Eddie

S3 · E12 · Father of the Bribe Comedy

Father of the Bribe

Hawkins, the father of Malcolm's new girlfriend Ashley, does not like the idea of Malcolm dating his daughter, and he offers Malcolm a bribe to stop seeing her.

09:30 30m

Malcolm & Eddie

S3 · E14 · Insemination Without Representation Comedy

Insemination Without Representation

On her 30th birthday, Nicolette is disappointed about not yet having a baby, so she asks Malcolm to father a child for her via artificial insemination.

10:00 30m

The Steve Harvey Show

S6 · E4 · Knit Picking Comedy

Knit Picking

Steve gets confused about Regina when she gives him mixed signals by saying to keep the relationship slow but then throwing a private and romantic anniversary.

10:30 30m

The Steve Harvey Show

S6 · E5 · Principal's Pet Comedy

Principal's Pet

Steve is supposed to proctor a test but when there's a disturbance he misses the appointment, allowing Romeo and Bullethead to cheat on the exam.

11:00 30m

Hangin' with Mr. Cooper

S1 · E17 · Boys Don't Leave Comedy

Boys Don't Leave

Tyler runs away from home after the new baby gets more attention than he does; Robin tries to come up with a gift for her boyfriend's birthday.

11:30 30m

Hangin' with Mr. Cooper

S1 · E18 · The Unteachables Comedy

The Unteachables

Mark takes over as teacher for a history class but soon learns that none of the students have any interest in learning anything he tries to teach them.

Daytime

12:00 30m

The Nanny

S1 · E19 · The Gym Teacher Comedy

The Gym Teacher

Fran is at a loss when she discovers that Maggie has the same gym teacher that she had when she was in school; Maxwell must deal with an unruly actor.

12:30 30m

The Nanny

S1 · E20 · Ode to Barbra Joan Comedy

Ode to Barbra Joan

When C.C.'s father invites Fran to attend a Barbra Streisand concert, Fran realizes that C.C. is jealous and wonders whether she should pass on going.

13:00 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E12 · It's No Place Like Home for the Holidays Comedy

It's No Place Like Home for the Holidays

A snowstorm blows through the city and traps everyone inside where they currently are situated, leaving Dan and D.J. to cook dinner at the house.

13:30 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E13 · Crime and Punishment Comedy

Crime and Punishment

DJ gets in trouble with Dan for taking Darlene's offensive comic book to school; Dan has a powerful reaction when Roseanne learns that Fisher has beaten Jackie.

14:00 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E14 · War and Peace Comedy

War and Peace

Dan returns home from his stay in jail to numerous rumors about how he ended up there, but no one truly knows what exactly happened that night.

14:30 30m

Roseanne

S5 · E15 · Lanford Daze Comedy

Lanford Daze

Darlene doesn't like the Lunch Box or the food they serve, but when she is caught vandalizing the restaurant, she is forced to sell their food at the fair.

15:00 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E15 · God Needles George Comedy

God Needles George

The Lopez family contemplates putting Needles to sleep when they learn that he has a tumor; George and Max make extravagant promises while praying for the dog.

15:30 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E16 · Benny and Randy Comedy

Benny and Randy

Randy wants to take his relationship with Benny to the next level, but she balks at the idea; George inadvertently prompts Randy to break up with her.

16:00 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E17 · Weekend at Benny's Comedy

Weekend at Benny's

George is left in charge of the kids when Angie is away on business; when Carmen and Max misbehave, George sends them to Benny's house for the weekend.

16:30 30m

George Lopez

S3 · E18 · Jason Tutors Max Comedy

Jason Tutors Max

Max must pass an upcoming state-mandated test, leaving George and Angie to search for a suitable tutor; Jason volunteers to be Max's tutor.

17:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E13 · T*R*A*S*H Comedy

T*R*A*S*H

Al and Griff join the Army in order to receive regular meals, but while in the service they end up having to help settle a garbage strike.

17:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E17 · Live Nude Peg Comedy

Live Nude Peg

A disguised Peggy begins performing at a local strip club, and Al falls in love with her character, not knowing that it is really Peggy.

Tonight's Highlights

18:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E18 · A Babe in Toyland Comedy

A Babe in Toyland

Kelly takes the place of the host of a kids' show and when she becomes a huge hit the success goes to her head; Peg and Al get some new twin beds.

18:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E19 · Birthday Boy Toy Comedy

Birthday Boy Toy

Marcy gives Jefferson a membership to a health club and he gets a lot of attention when he starts using it; Bud directs a commercial for the shoe store.

19:00 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E20 · Lez Be Friends Comedy

Lez Be Friends

Marcy's lesbian cousin Mandy comes to visit and Marcy becomes jealous of her cousin's popularity because she shares the same interests as Al.

19:30 30m

Married ... with Children

S11 · E21 · Damn Bundys Comedy

Damn Bundys

Al wants to play for the Chicago Bears so badly that he makes a deal with the devil and to the devil's dismay, Al finds Hell a little too easy.

20:00 30m

The King of Queens

S9 · E13 · China Syndrome, Part 2 Comedy ▶ Now

China Syndrome, Part 2

Doug and Carrie's marriage remains on the rocks after Doug learns that they still own the apartment in the city, but both will have to set differences aside.

20:30 30m

The King of Queens

S1 · E1 · Pilot Comedy

Pilot

Doug Heffernan gets a 70-inch TV to make his sport's basement dream complete, but the dream turns into a nightmare when Carrie's father moves into the basement.

21:00 30m

The King of Queens

S1 · E6 · Head First Comedy

Head First

Doug takes Arthur out to a pool hall, where Arthur starts a barroom brawl. Carrie's just happy Doug invited him along and shows her appreciation in the bedroom.

21:30 30m

The King of Queens

S1 · E2 · Fat City Comedy

Fat City

After seeing a picture of Carrie's overweight mother, Doug hints to Carrie that it's time to diet now so as not to fatten up later in life.

22:00 30m

Two and a Half Men

S2 · E9 · Yes, Monsignor Comedy

Yes, Monsignor

Charlie becomes ecstatic when he coincidentally runs into his dream girl and realizes that her marriage has fallen apart, allowing him to pursue her.

22:30 30m

Two and a Half Men

S2 · E10 · The Salmon Under My Sweater Comedy

The Salmon Under My Sweater

Charlie asks for help in writing a cartoon theme song based on Jake's favorite comic book; Rose's depth and intellect take Alan by surprise.

23:00 30m

Two and a Half Men

S2 · E11 · Last Chance to See Those Tattoos Comedy

Last Chance to See Those Tattoos

Charlie is horrified to discover many of his former flames have banded together to create a website that is purely committed to revealing his faults.

23:30 30m

Two and a Half Men

S2 · E12 · A Lungful of Alan Comedy

A Lungful of Alan

A female friend from Alan's high school days arrives in town and does her best to force the two brothers to compete for her affections.